While in Honduras, I was completely culture shocked even though nothing out rightly surprised me. Because of this, I wasn't convinced it was culture shock. Why would it be if nothing surprised me?
With everything that I experienced there, it takes a different type of processing when you come back, to really understand what I saw. In this, it is so difficult to trust that God has a plan for the world when there are fourteen year olds in the maternity ward in the hospital. Or when there are open wounds on people. Or when these little kids don't eat regularly. It's especially difficult to see that He has something planned for me when my first reaction is to back away and trust my independent capable self who clearly fails instead of running into His arms and collapsing in another ultimate surrender. Sometimes it's hard to trust that He loves me in the middle of all this.
This all came into my view in a time where I actually slowed down my heart enough to listen.
"Trust in the Lord forever, for in the Lord God you have an everlasting rock."